I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Barsexuality is the new black.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.