just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize