Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Farmville is her only friend.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Watching her eat just hurts me
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
