and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
