It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
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