I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Pappa wants mamma naked
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
