No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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