Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize