Don't you send me to vm
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
