Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
