used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
where are my eyebrows?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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