Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I stole a fireplace last night.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Randomize
