I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
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