It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
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