Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
