no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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