There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
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