You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
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