Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Randomize