There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
time to smoke my breakfast
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize