That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
