Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
