walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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