I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
