She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
