I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
