Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Randomize