I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
