I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
