She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
