I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
