Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize