IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
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