he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
They have beer where we have blood.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
