The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
