is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
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