I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
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yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
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4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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