he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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