So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
