How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
you never un-have a 4some
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Randomize
