Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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