meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
You left your phone here
Wait...
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