Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
