the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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