That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
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