From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
