I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize