Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
