help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
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