Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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