are you still at the devil's house?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
so much tequila, so little girl.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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