I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
